MEN...

I found this piece taped inside my closet door...I know I was the one who placed it there (maybe 10 years ago or more!) but I don’t remember where I got it or who gave it to me or who really wrote it.  Read on ‘cause it’s truly inspiring and amusing...:)

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay.

Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviours. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from your heartache.

Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be. Slower is better.

Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve, then heck no, you can’t be “friends.” A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.

Don’t settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.

Don’t stay because you think “it will get better.” You will be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.

The only person you can control in a relationship is YOU.

Avoid men who’ve got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn’t marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any different?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.

Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man’s behaviour. Change comes from within.

Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are.

Never borrow someone else’s man. If he cheated with you, he’ll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

All men are NOT dogs. You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two way street.

You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage...deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complementary...not supplementary.

Dating is fun...even if he doesn’t turn out to be Mr. Right!

Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always knows where you are, and you are always readily available to him---he takes it for granted.

Never move into his mother’s house.

Never co-sign for a man. (hallelujah, thank you Jesus!)

Don’t fully commit to a man who doesn’t give you everything that you need.Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Share this with your girlfriends...you’ll make someone smile...another rethink her choices and another woman prepare.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them and entire lifetime to forget them...!

How To Get a TIN ID CARD (Manila)

It was year 2000 when I started to work in a company of Government-Owned and/or Controlled Corporations. But alas! I still do not have a TIN ID card. I know my Tax Identification Number though since I have been filing my Income tax Return every year.  I am just really fond of collecting ID’s--- government- issued preferably--- because it makes me feel like a good citizen (and complete!). Well, after 12 years, my friend/co-employee, Ferdie, and I decided to finally get a copy once and for all.

It was pretty simple. We headed straight to Bureau of Internal Revenue, Intramuros branch via taxi. Upon entering the building, the guard shot a copy of any of our IDs—for security reasons, of course.  We were asked what our agenda was and we told the guard that we would want to secure a copy of our TIN ID. We were then instructed to proceed to  2^nd Floor. From there, we found the desk responsible for the issuance of the ID card. We were questioned if it was our first time to secure a copy. Yes, we said! Because you see, it is free of charge for first timers. But for reissuance, you have to pay 100pesos. And so we filled up a small form with the following information: Complete name (Last, middle, first), address, TIN number, Company, Company address, contact number. It is a MUST to know your TIN number. This would facilitate the person in-charge in verifying your identification.  Anyway, we were requested to come back after 2 weeks since they ran out of blank ID cards for printing. But they say in most cases, they could easily release your TIN ID if there are less applicants (and there’s the availability of materials). Overall, it took us less than 10 minutes to finish the process.

Note: Bring with you 2 copies of 1x1 photo J

10th Floor BIR Building, Anda Circle, Bonifacio Drive, Port Area, Manila, Metro Manila‎

My Happy Ending by AVRIL LAVIGNE

Once again, I sing AVRIL LAVIGNE's famous song, MY HAPPY ENDING....LOL!

On Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder

After being in a roller coaster relationship for almost 5 years, only then did I realize that the person I loved the most has a Borderline Personality Disorder.  I felt from the start that there is something wrong in our relationship. That it was not healthy as it is supposed to be. Yet I allowed myself to be its victim up to the point I cannot tolerate any more. My patience was all used up. My emotions were abused. I changed who I really was, thinking things would get better. Despite of it all, I was at the losing end because of my emotional attachment to him.

I loved him. Even with his ugly past. He said a person could change if he wants to. He said he wanted a normal relationship. I believed him.

But how could this change be possible if he has Borderline Personality Disorder? I never understood this mental condition until the day we broke up and I started doing some research of my own. Based on what I have read, some features of BPD include:

When faced with crises, he copes like a toddler. In other words, he does not know how to handle his problems. Instead of finding solutions, he would just wallow in his own pain and sadness.  His sadness is so intense that he resorts to self mutilation or substance abuse just to relieve the pain.

He fears abandonment or rejection and is very sensitive about it. But when you show how much you care, he will be the one to distance himself. So inconsistent.

He only cares about his own feelings of pain. No empathy for the partner. And so it is useless to share your own feelings about the problem. He dwells mostly on his own pain.

When criticized or confronted, he answers with anger. He could say words that you dread to hear. Most of the times you will question yourself if this person was the one who just told you how much he loves you.

He would resort to self pity so that you will feel guilty as well.

Being with him is like always walking on eggshells. His moods can swing back and forth like a pendulum and you’ll never know even what slightest thing could trigger it. Sometimes even if you already made plans, once his mood changes, the whole preparation is suddenly disregarded.

Because of his unpredictable mood swings, you would rather censor your thoughts and emotions. No reactions = no fights

One minute he is an angel. The next minute, you just saw a devil reincarnate. It’s either he loves you at the moment or hates you. There is no gray area.

At first he will cling to you as if he would not want you to leave him. He will make you feel as if his world revolves around you. Expect this at first. But it will never happen again.

He does not hold responsibility of his actions.  He would always blame you for his shortcomings. And if he has committed something terrible, it is still your fault. YOU are the reason why he did it.

He always tests your reaction on something. It’s like having control over your feelings.

He isolates you from your friends. He feels jealous of them because for him your friends are more important than him.

He makes the rules. And he can bend it anytime he wants.

Out of sight, out of mind.  For him, distance makes the heart colder rather than fonder. For him, it’s a form of abandonment.

 What he wants, he will get at whatever cost.

Once he feels or perceives that abandonment is at hand, he will pursue other girls so he won’t be left alone by himself. Thus forming more unstable relationships. It is a cyclic pattern.

Don't get me wrong... He has some good qualities too.. Yet it is sad to admit that I have experienced all of these characteristics when I was in a relationship with a borderline. Now that I understand his condition, I found the answers that were ones kept hidden in my mind. Now I know why he acted that way. Why he said those words.  But one thing is for sure, it is very difficult to love someone with BPD.

If you can’t endure it, better end it. It could be dangerous to your mental health.